Wednesday, 26 January 2005

Ch-Ch--Check it out

MilkandCookies - Beastie Boys

Ah, these guy's videos crack me up. Love the 'intergalactic' one. Takes me back to my youth when the charts weren't just entirely comprised of tallentless jail-bait teen bands with ugly hair and fashion-victim clothes.

Friday, 21 January 2005

What qualifies you to be an IT recruitment agent?

If I had a pound for every time an IT recruitment agent has wasted my time, I'd have enough money to afford a deposit on a small flat in Surrey. These guys are complete f***tards. They're basically sales people with f***-all knowledge about what they're selling. Sales people are usually scum but these guys could teach the average sales person a thing or two about slime.

I'm not happy with my job so I'm looking for work. Like most IT people, I have to register with free job-search sites - which means I'll get every cowboy and his clue-less cousin ringing me up at work on my mobile and spamming my inbox.

The junk email I can cope with because I have a separate account just for that and when this is all over and I'm happily employed elsewhere I will ditch my mobile number and get a new one (with the added incentive that I'll avoid being rung up my project manager - who thinks my mobile is his own personal technical support line). What irritates the crap out of me is the time-wasting phone calls.

After I've left my open-plan office to find somewhere private to talk, I usually find the agent wants to sell me the job for about 15 minutes while i patiently wait for them to let me have a word in edge-ways. My questions then are usually: where is it, what does it pay and what are the entry requirements? I swear 90% of the time the agent hasn't even considered that these are things that are the most important aspects of any job! They're too bussy trying to make a sale rather than find a match. Half the time they'll either not know the answer to my questions -but they'll lie and pretend they do!- the other half they'll know it but lie to make it sound more attractive - anything just to get you to agree to let yout CV join the cannon-fodder pile to make it look like they've been productive.

A while ago, when I still had patience for these people, I gave one of them a 'free computer lesson' because he didn't know s*** about the skills the company he was recruiting for was after. All he knew was 'they want Java'. They want Java? What kind? Embedded, Standard, Enterprise, what? This guy didn't know the difference between C++, Java and Perl. I don't expect the average person on the street to know that but when agencies hire IT recruiters they should at least make sure they have a clue!

These agents earn upwards of 30k - not counting commission - that's more than most coders! Companies pay agencies huge fees for these cretins to find their staff. I think it's time agents picked up a book, learnt some s***, earned their salaries and stopped wasting everybody's time!

I'm never getting out of here alive.


UPDATE: Update: got an email from a recruiter this morning, just asking me to SIGN and POST (not just email) a 4 page terms and conditions CONTRACT between them and me! Needless to say, I told them where they could stick their contract.

Wednesday, 19 January 2005

And relax...

After a string of rants, i feel compelled to introduce some fluffyness to calm down....

Awwwww.

...'s just y'know idiots getting me down. Too many stupid people in the world, not enough sniper rifles and tall bell-towers....ahhg the voices... better take my pills again....

'I am the Angle of death, the time of purifcation is at hand' (simpsons)


more cute-ness (found on b3ta).

Another example of government ignorance regarding P2P

SB 96 Senate Bill - INTRODUCED: "...any person or entity that sells, advertises, or distributes peer-to-peer file sharing software, as defined, that enables the user to electronically disseminate recordings or audiovisual works over the Internet who fails to exercise reasonable care in preventing use of the software to commit an unlawful act... is punishable by a fine not exceeding $2,500, imprisonment in a county jail for a period not to exceed one year..."

Ah! This is so stupid it hurts my brain to read it!

FACT: P2P typically runs over the protocols UDP and TCP/IP (or rather other protocols like HTTP and Sockets run on top of these) . These are also the main protocols that support networking, hence most of the Internet (a web page is, after all, just a 'file').

FACT: These protocols provide the means to break the law in exactly the same way as the P2P software does, with exactly the same absence of any kind of anti-piracy provision. Is Senator Murray going to try to hold the creators of this software accountable M$, Berkeley, MIT, etc?

Saying P2P should be banned because it's mostly used for piracy is like saying the Internet should be banned entirely at work and in schools because it's mostly used for porn rather than educational/business purposes.

How exactly would one go about adapting the Internet protocols or P2P software to "take due care to prevent piracy" anyway? Sounds like a machine learning problem to me!

They're trying to pass this law to make it illegal to provide technology to people that could be used to commit a crime. Tell you what a**holes: I'll agree to that when you hold people who sell guns and other weapons (including governments) accountable for the atrocities that are committed with them! Not so worried about that sort of accountability are you? Hypocrites.


Article found at Slashdot

Monday, 17 January 2005

Why the world needs the BBC

Another example of Fox News rapid-defence of Bush. I wonder why they're so afraid to let people criticise Bush on air?

If it weren't for the BBC, the only kind of media coverage of important events would be by biased right-wing a**holes like Bill O'Reilly - who never even give other people with views different to theirs a chance to explain themselves and offer up a different perspective other than 'America is great and we're always the good guys'.

For example: Transcript of Interview of Jeremy Glick by Bill O'Reilly. You can see the video here. Is that even remotely fair and balanced reporting?

'Sorry people, I wouldn't have invited him on the show if I knew that was what he thought' - unbelievable! He doesn't even try to pretend to be fair and balanced and Fox News has the nerve to criticise the BBC for being biased?

Fox News could learn a thing or two from the BBC about reporting, if they weren't so busy fellating the current administration.

This is what happens when your funding comes directly from advertisers and big corporations who themselves are entirely political and effectively get to censor the news because Fox is worried about one thing: money! Keeping the investors happy! You can't have fair and balanced media with vested interests.

But the BBC doesn't just benefit the UK - it's available world-wide (well, except for China and places like that - and not in the USA if Rupert Murock has his way). Unlike a lot of newspaper sites all over the world -you don't have to pay to view the stories on its website (not directly anyway)!

Some members of the government (particularly those that like white-washes) and the corporate media (Rupert Murdock, mostly) want to destroy the BBC -and they're just looking for an excuse to get rid of this little embarrassment to them.

In 2006 the government will review the 'royal charter' situation. Hopefully better judgment will prevail and we'll get to keep it as it is - I dread to think of the alternative: Fox News? I can almost imagine it. Well groomed, shiny-toothed yapping little lap dogs of big corporations, acting out the news with faked passion and interest like a nightmarish pantomime.

F*** you Rupert Murdock and the horse you rode in on.

Tuesday, 11 January 2005

Security researcher to be jailed for finding bugs in software?

Full story here (found via slashdot).

That is f***ing ridiculous!

"According to Tena's Web site, his research "showed how the program worked, demonstrated a few security flaws and carried out some tests with real viruses. Unlike the advertising claimed, this software didn't detect and stop ‘100 percent of viruses’."

Tena, who is currently a researcher for Harvard University in Massachusetts, said that Tegam responded in a "weird way" by first branding him a terrorist and then filing a formal complaint in Paris. During the resulting tribunal, Tena said the judge decided that because the published exploits included some re-engineered source code from Viguard’s software, he had violated French copyright laws."

This pi**ed me off so much, I decided to write to the company involved and let them know what complete jacka**es this court case is making out of them. I mean, when you make claims like 'stops 100% of viruses' be prepared to be tested and if you only get tested by security professionals -where the worst they ever do is make you red faced- count yourself lucky. Imagine what would have happened if a bank had used your crappy software and a black-hat hackers had got in because of your crappy code?

Why not drop my friends an email here and let them know what people think about this kind of greedy, arrogant behaviour?


UPDATE: searching their news site, I found this page, which would appear to be their defence of their actions. Not much of a defence though, I mean if you're going to accuse people of being one-sided and lying, then at least tell us your side (what your point is) - rather than just bitching like little girls about having your work 'deprecated'.

Idiots.

.

Monday, 10 January 2005

Genius

I took one of these spam-vertisement IQ test things -I was bored- anyway... apparently I have an IQ of 136 and I'm a 'Visionary Philosopher' - according to this lot anyway. Is 136 good? Maybe, if it was a proper IQ test. Try it out but only if you're bored silly and need some exercise for your brain.

136? Visionary Philosopher? Pfffft! How come I'm still poor then, eh?

Or maybe 'Visionary Philosopher' is the PC way of saying 'daydreamer'... i.e.:

Fat bastard is to 'gravitationally challenged' as 'Visionary Philosopher' is to
(a) theoretical physicist
(b) astronaut
(c) penniless daydreamer

Send your answers on a postcard to coding_monkey@hotmail.com. Enclose £50 for my exclusive, personalised IQ report. SAMPLE.