Friday, 8 October 2004

Do any kids still speak English?

Browse through any blogger-type site and you'll find hundred of pages of drivel written by teenagers, much of which will follow the same pattern as this fine example:

"hmm 1week le... nvr update blog... hmmm exam already wahz... so fast... hmmm yesterdae mornin needa take 2 exam paper...wAhz strEss... hmmm...den after tat ... hmmm actually wanna go eat lunch wif thongEe dey all de but i already ask darl wait 4 me at e porch dere le so cannot go eat lunch wif dem...hmmm... "

....it goes on and on like that. Ignore the fact the these logs are full of stories about what they had for lunch, or the fact that they've run out of 'sunny D' in the fridge. I'm horrified by the abuse of the English language. Does anyone learn grammar anymore, or spelling? Now, I know I can't spell and my grammar probably sucks but I was raised to take pride in our language and do your best to write good clean English, because otherwise you just sound like kind of a dick.

Why the hell is everyone writing everything in 'sms' all the time?

c u l8r muva fkr

The next person that writes something like that to me in an email, gets shot.

and..... what's ....with ...all ....the ....pauses?

I think the mighty Maddox puts it best when he says 'Wireless internet may very well destroy our chances of contacting intelligent life.' Damn straight. Its more likely to make them want to come over with a load of battleships and wipe out the human race, simply for being too god-damn anoying! Personally, I think we'd deserve it.